Walking Through Fire
I love reading a good memoir. Stories about the experiences of others are interesting and thought provoking. I recently read one that was written by an acquaintance, recently turned new friend, Vaneetha Risner. She was a member of my current church years ago but is still connected to many people I hold dear. God reconnected us when she graciously agreed to read my manuscript and subsequently started mentoring me through the book launch process.
I knew bits of pieces of her story that I’d heard from others over the years, but I didn’t understand the full puzzle of life-changing circumstances she experienced until I read her entire memoir. Her story is remarkable. It is rich with honest memories that we can all relate to. She has suffered physically, first with polio then with post-polio syndrome; a painful chronic disease resulting from the initial viral infection. She’s also endured the death of an infant son and infidelity in her marriage. Given what she’s been through you would think her faith would’ve shattered, but in fact it’s quite the opposite.
Her memoir was released a few weeks ago and she asked me to do a little work for her as she prepped for the big event. I got the privilege of transcribing some interviews she had with Joni Eareckson Tada, Randy Alcorn, and Katherine Wolf. (If you don’t know who these people are please go look them up right now!!!) As I listened to Randy’s interview, he said something that struck a nerve in my heart. He told Vaneetha that he recommends people write down all the bad things that have happened to them and then, in turn, write all the good things they’ve experienced. He asked, “Try to notice how many of the good things actually came out of those bad things that have happened to us.” The first thing I thought when I heard him say that was, “Really dude? Are all the awful, unwanted, and disturbing thoughts I’ve ever had and the countless hours I’ve worried about them really producing actual blessings in my life?” My initial response to his challenge was basically to question whether God has, in fact, used and glorified my OCD.
After many more hours of listening to people who have suffered far greater challenges than I ever have, the truth hit me. I look at my battles with OCD through a lens that now features them as blessings. I have grown closer to the Lord in my anxiety and I am thankful for what I’ve learned along the way. I am grateful for how God has used therapy to change me. I have reaped the benefits of counseling. I understand the struggles the anxieties of those around me more empathetically and feel more connected to those who have similar issues. The process wasn’t fun, and I still don’t enjoy feeling anxiety brought on by the OCD, but ultimately God has used my diagnosis and many good things have come out of it.
I know a treasure trove of people who have suffered far more than I have. It scares me as I type that because I am well-aware that my circumstances can change from comfortable to heart-wrenching in a moment. Reading stories like Vaneetha’s makes me feel scared of what is possible in this life, but it also shows me the remarkable ways God works in those things. I recommend this book to anyone who has felt or is currently feeling like God has left them. Vaneetha’s story is overflowing with reminders of God’s goodness, faithfulness, and love that can help reboot a discouraged heart. It is impossible to read it and not walk away deeply encouraged.
You can visit Vaneetha’s website for fantastic blog posts and book information. You can also follow her on instagram @vaneetharisner.
www.vaneetha.com
