Lice, Lice Baby.
My oldest child is fourteen and we’ve made it this far without ever getting head lice. I’ve heard horror stories about these creepy little bugs, but we’ve never had the privilege of getting them…until now. I was knee-deep in facial pain from my teeth and a lingering sinus infection when I accidentally noticed the odd oval-shaped dots on my daughter’s head a few weeks ago. I didn’t have lice on my radar but instead was nervously anticipating a dental appointment I had that afternoon. Given my lack of experience with these vermin, I did a quick Google search to confirm my initial suspicions. Normally, I would’ve reacted with sheer panic to this news, but at the moment all I could do was laugh. That week, God had continually called me to a posture of humility from my knees. I was desperate to feel a small amount of control, but God kept saying, “Nope. You need to trust me…and fully.”
I laughed. My baffled daughter stared at my reflection in the mirror like I was crazy because even she knows me well enough to know bugs on our heads were not something I’d normally laugh about. It was in that moment when I fully relented all control to God because I had nothingbut fumes left to contribute. I’d been worn down and it felt oddly freeing.
God used the unwelcome bugs to not only distract me from my upcoming dental visit, but He was giving me yet another opportunity to trust Him during a stressful time. My OCD likes to settle on contamination, so the washing and cleaning can get out of hand for me in situations like this one. Since I was already desperately relying on God for the dentist visit, adding lice to the mix felt expected and hilarious. Of course, tiny bugs were a perfect addition to my suffocating mental state. I was miraculously able to take it one task at a time without obsessing about any single thought for too long. It was exposure therapy 101.
The bedroom my girls share looked like a stuffed animal crime scene after I’d put their puffy friends in trash bags strewn around the room. My youngest daughter has an entourage of stuffed animals she sleeps with, and I knew it would be a challenge for her to let them go for a couple of weeks. She’s recently been dealing with obsessive-like routines that are rooted in fear and her bedtime has posed many challenges. The change to her bed set-up wouldn’t be easy for her, but like any exposure, it was going to ultimately be beneficial as she learns to navigate modifying her thought patterns. Together with her counselor we’d been slowly exposing her to stressful situations when she’d have to use strategies but getting rid of her bedtime friends was going to make her feel like she was jumping off a cliff. I wasn’t excited about the cascade of panic she might experience.
The morning after her first, oddly seamless night in a sparse bed she said, “Mom, I like my new bed. I feel like I slept better. I didn’t have the pressure to do all my routines because my buddies weren’t there. Maybe I’ll rotate one friend at a time instead of having them all lined up.” I know my face oozed with surprise because she then replied with, “What?”
I didn’t think God would take something like disgusting head lice to benefit our family in such big and impactful ways. Not only did He show me that I could handle the stress of this kind of circumstance without letting my contamination fears take over, but He used it to help my daughter with her intrusive fears. I marvel at how God is in the details of every situation we face, even the smallest stresses of life that can often trigger OCD.
Was having lice fun? No. Did God use lice to help me and my family? Yes.
I guess both things can be true at the same time.
